You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
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