Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
