3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
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