just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Randomize
