My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
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