So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
can you have the cops turn on the gps locator on my phone...i just woke up in a Hooters uniform and I have no idea where I am...
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
Randomize
