now i know why i became what i already was.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
