i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
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