If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
