you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
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every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
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