make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
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Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
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Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
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