I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
