fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
Randomize
