We're like a lot better than the average bears
I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Randomize
