Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
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