You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
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