I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Randomize
