Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
is this the sara with the beer cane?
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize
