youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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