Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
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