i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
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