Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Randomize
