East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Randomize
