4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
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Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
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There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
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