I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize
