that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Randomize
