True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
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