You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
Randomize