paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
