remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Randomize
