You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
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Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
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My glasses were in the garbage this morning
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
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