i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
only you would photoshop your dick
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
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