I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Randomize
