Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
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but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
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The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Let the clothes fall where they may.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
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