I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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