I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
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