office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
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