actually, I'm a sock model
if any two of us come back from the bar and aren't getting laid we will systematically destroy everything in the kitchen
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Randomize
