Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
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I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
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just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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