so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
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