You can't motorboat a personality
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
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