Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I showed him my bush... on skype.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
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