A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
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