she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
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Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
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Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
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