I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
