Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
These 19 Teachers Had Very Inappropriate Interactions With Students
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Women Confess 25 Instant Deal-Breakers On A Man’s Dating Profile
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.