okay pat passed out under dana's car
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
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she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.