I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
i drank out of a bidet.
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
