We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
Randomize
