But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
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