How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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