You really coming over, don't trick.
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
Randomize