Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
just found out I caught the bouquet at the wedding. I win for being the drunkest yet most functional bridesmaid.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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