jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
Randomize
